Heavy

Struggling to write this one...

The last few days have been pretty tough.

I am torn between my need to share with you all and the responsibility of taking the high road.

Have y'all ever noticed that the high road sometimes stinks?

The last few weeks have been spent waiting on news from our attorney in Guatemala. He's been trying to meet with the judge who has La P's case.

Unfortunately, the judge who had been instructing us on how to proceed just retired.

The new judge will not meet with our attorney without a representative from her orphanage.

The King sent an email to the orphanage asking for some assistance.

Not for assistance in the adoption...just assistance in obtaining the medical visa to deal with her medical needs.

We made clear that we want to provide her with medical care even if we aren't able to adopt her.

The reaction was not what we hoped.

For now,the door to the orphanage has been closed to us.

We were asked to not return...to "cut our ties".

The same people who, in March, told us they had been praying for a family for her have asked us to let go.

We were completely caught off guard.

Not sure how to move forward.

Not sure what God is doing.

But we know that He is doing something.

My heart hurts.

I can't think about not seeing La P again.

Just gonna take it day by day.

Comments

[Shannon]

I wish there were words to comfort you....just know I will continue to pray.

[Megan]

Oh, I am so sorry for you and your family! How heartbreaking. I don't think I've ever actually commented on your blog, but I've been prayerfully following this LaP story from the beginning. This post brought tears to my eyes. As hard as it is, thanks for sharing. It reminds me to lift your whole family up in prayer more fervently than ever.

[Erin]

My heart hurts for you....I am praying for you all. When we lived 20 minutes away from our daughter (who was in foster care), there were so many nights I just wanted to go to their house and just pick her up and run away because the paperwork took SOOO long. At one point it looked like her birth parents may get custody again. God did not put La P into your lives for no reason -- I am praying that He moves hearts and brings La P home soon. HUGS!

[angela]

Oh I'm so sorry, I hope you can find comfort and understanding from the Lord.

[Me-Moddy]

Oh heavens. What a difficult post that must have been for you to type. I have been wondering so much about how things were going with La P, but was praying that good news was on the horizon. Sometimes words in a time like this bring no comfort - only prayer. God IS up to something. You can count on that and trust in that. Hang on. I heard once that we should never put a period where God just wants a comma. I am praying that this is just a "comma" right now. Hold fast.

[Soliloquy]

Understanding your heart tonight. Our own adoption looks very much like it's not going to happen at all, and we are also trying to understand God's plan.

Does the call change? Were we terribly wrong in what we understood God was calling us to?

Will we ever understand?

Praying for you.

[RLR]

Oh, I am so sorry! I'll be praying and waiting to hear what God has in store for your family. ((hugs))

[Heather]

So sorry to hear of this setback. I'll be keeping the new developments in my prayers.

[Molly]

Oh, I am so sorry that this door has been closed (even if temporarily). I am sure that God's will in this situation with your family and La P will blow all of us away.

Continue to pray for you and your family.

[Mrs. Oh]

Oh no! No, no, no! I've always said when(if) I get to heaven I am going to ask to see God's blueprints - cuz some stuff I just don't understand! Will be praying that although he is closing this door that he will also open a window for y'all and that precious La P.

[Nicole@OnTheRun]

Praying for you...and for a God-sized miracle.

[Tonggu Momma]

I am so very sorry. And you know I am praying for y'all. And for little Miss P.

[Headless Mom]

Oh no. I hope this means that God has much bigger plans. Not that it makes it any easier right now... Will continue to pray!

[Kellyn]

Oh...I am so very very sorry. I can only imagine the pain you are in right now.

Prayers and much love.

[Leslie]

I'm praying for your family and this situaton. My heart hurts for you.

[courtney e.]

oh man. sometimes don't you just want to say, "Lord, what are you up to?". i'll be praying for you all--specifically for LaP. i don't know what, if anything, she's been told but the poor child has already endured so much--she deserved her forever family.

[Angie]

Oh, how you must be grieving right now. I am so sorry. I will pray for all of this... and for God to quiet your hearts in the midst of heavy darkness. This makes me so sad for all of you.

[Kelly @ Love Well]

Oh B. I'm so sorry.

I wish there were words. But there aren't. What a mess of confusion and uncertainty.

I will pray. Pray for clarity. Pray for peace. Pray for authenticity. Pray for miracles.

[Kari]

Exodus 14:14
"The LORD will fight for you while you keep silent"

I'll be praying for you!!

[Steff]

Oh B,
My heart goes out to you and yours. I too hope this is only a comma in Gods plan.
Prayers from here.
Steff

[sandee]

"When you saw only one set of footprints, it is then that i carried you". I dont have words that would do justice to your pain but i will pray for you.

[karen]

praying for all of you this morning...

[Lindsay @ Bytes of Memory]

ooo no!! I am praying for you and your family. Also for the orphanage. You are right God is working and he has a plan!

[Jenna]

Oh, I am so sad to hear that. Still praying.

[Melanie Harrington]

"God will make a way, where there seems to be no way. He works in ways we cannot see. God will make a way ..." These words were my first thoughts upon reading this post. I am praying for you today.