The Queen B

Hurry and Check This Out!!

My mother-in-law has this awesome serving bowl that she uses every time we eat at her house. It is divided into four squares and is great for tacos, salads and chili. She has used it for dessert toppings, too.

It is a Food Network dish, and they are sold at Kohl's. So I went online to find one today...guess what!!! All of the Food Network serving dishes are buy one get one free!! And through today, the shipping is 99 cents!!

I may actually, for the first time in my whole entire life, buy Christmas presents early.

Go check it out!!

Freaky Friday

This has been a tough week. Very emotional.

We know of friends who have suffered great loss this week. Friends who have dealt with difficult anniversaries. Friends who are working through life altering lessons.

We've experienced friends losing their home and all their possessions to a fire on Tuesday.

I've heard of a young man losing his life in an accident on his way home from work--less than a mile from his house.

A friend whose mom has been slowly fading to Alzheimer's, but the end is near.

And we all feel pretty darn yucky.

But here's what I know. I know that God is good. In the midst of trials, God is good. When things seem to be hopeless, God is good. When we are worn stinkin' out, God is good.

And I rest in that.

I don't have to know how, why, when or what. Because I know Who.

And I rest in Him.

I hope that each of you has a very refreshing weekend filled with laughter and joy.

And maybe a nap.

Lost at The Palace

Well good grief.

The Palace, as a whole, is losing its mind.

I think we have a mild case of Dementia: Family Edition.

It started with The King and his misplaced snowboarding pants. Which was a stinkin' mess. We never did find those things.

Last Saturday, we were getting ready to leave for The Farm and we couldn't find my car keys.

Let me just tell you--I don't lose things. I am very responsible (anal) and always put things where they belong. My keys always go either on the hooks by the back door or they are in my purse. But not Saturday.

We looked everywhere. Everywhere.

Me? I'd have been completely fine to use the spare set and order new ones.

(Because if I can't find them, aliens must have come down and taken them back to the mothership.)

But not The King. That would signal defeat.

Since we were bringing the birthday cake for the party, we kind of had to go. Keys or no keys. We were forced to use the spare. (For which I was incredibly grateful.)

On the way to the party, The King said that when we got home we were going to look until we found them. Even if it took 3 hours.

Great.

When we finally got back home, we searched lots of places. LOTS OF PLACES.

andwefoundtheminmysweaterfromthedaybefore

I'm so disappointed in myself. I've decided to blame it on my shellfish allergy. I think fishy stuff is supposed to improve memory. It is not my fault. It is the fish. Or lack thereof.

THEN.

The Princess has been saving some itunes giftcards that she received for her birthday and Christmas. She has been waiting for The King to help her set up an account. We've talked about it every weekend since October. Finally, The King was ready to help her Sunday evening.

Only she can't find the cards.

Tears. Wailing. Gnashing of teeth.

We looked in every purse (and there are a lot of purses). We looked in every drawer. We looked in every folder (and there are a lot of folders). We looked everywhere. Nada.

Being the sacrificial mother that I am (and wanting the wailing to stop) I sacrificed the itunes giftcard that I won from The Fritz Facts.

Before you begin criticizing my mothering, we agreed that she would give me one of her cards when we locate them.

And you've all caved to make the wailing stop. You know you have.

I suppose we are going to be tying strings around our fingers, putting post-it notes on everything, getting those remote key locator things...you know, stuff for people who need a mental boost.

Or we could just start putting things back where they belong.

QBBQ #4 (Queen B's Beauty Quest Number Four)

My fellow slaves to beauty, you know the importance of a good foundation.

I mean, come on. We all must look as if we naturally have magnificent skin. Without actually having magnificent skin. A good foundation can totally do that for us.

I want to briefly run through the list of the foundations that I have used in the past few years.

Prescriptives Flawless Skin

Prescriptives Traceless

Prescriptives Virtually Fresh

Bobbi Brown Foundation Stick

Bobbi Brown Oil-Free Even Finish Foundation SPF 15

Bobbi Brown SPF 15 Tinted Moisturizer

Lancome Imanance

Lancome Bienfait Multi-Vital Teinte

Lancome Color Ideal

Lancome Teint Idole Ultra

L'Oreal True Match

BareMinerals

So you can see brand loyalty is one of my best qualities.

I must say that my favorites would have to be the Bobbi Brown SPF Tinted Moisturizer and the Prescriptives Traceless.

If you wanted to know.

Obviously, I am always on the prowl for new make-up.

Tell us what you like. Don't like. Want to try. Made you break out like a spotted frog. You know the drill.

More is Less?

I've been all wrapped up in Pantry Overhaul 2008.

It has been pretty much all-consuming.

During this process, I have discovered that my cookbook collection takes up way too much valuable small appliance space.

My Nannie collects cookbooks and I have been genetically engineered or predestined or nature vs. nurtured to do the same.

I think it is time to simplify my cookbook assemblage. I need to pare down to the essentials.

I'm just not certain what the essentials would be.

I thought I might share my list of my favorite cookbooks.

And then I thought maybe you could share yours.

And then I could copy you.

Which I know theoretically adds to the collection that I am supposed to be simplifying.

But if they are essential to you, then I must check them out.

Right?

I think I need to see ALL my options before scaling down to the best of the best.

Ok. Here I go.

Generally, I plan my meals a week at a time. That would be 5 meals, though. Not 7.

I like to use one cookbook each week. You know, rotate them. Change it up. Keep 'em guessing.

These are my current faves:

Fast Fixes with Mixes

The Moms Guide to Meal Makeovers

Semi-Homemade Slow Cooker Recipes

Southern Living Busy Moms Weeknight Favorites

These are just a sampling of the ones that I love.

Please tell me the cookbooks that you use the most. Even if it is your Granny's Quilting Group Cookbook. Or the 1978 Rotary Cookbook. Or the Junior League of Possum Trot Cookbook.

(I won't call it enabling if you won't.)

Farmgirl 101

So. My banana post yesterday? Supposed to be for today.

If I would've paid attention when I set the date for the auto post thing, it would've worked.

Oh well.

The Palace went to The Farm over the weekend. We attended a celebration for The King's grandfather's 80th birthday. The King's parents have a farm that is about 2 hours from The Palace. They don't live there. They just get their farm-fix there.

I'm not really a farm girl. I love the farm. I want to be a farm girl. Really, I do. I just don't have a lot of farm experience (a.k.a. no farm cred).

Case in point: I wore my black Frye boots. I thought they looked Farm-ish. Cowgirl-like. I'd blend right in, for sure.

I did ask The King if I could keep them from getting dirty. He assured me that I could. He reassured me of that even as we were loading on the 4-wheeler.

Then we came to this...

MmmmHmmmm.

Did I mention that The Princess was driving? It worked out really well for me and my boots.

All of The King's family had a nice laugh over it. I overheard several comments like, "I bet that's the dirtiest that girl's ever been."

I'm sure that was meant in its most positive application.

Nobody has mentioned this to me, but I'm wondering if maybe The Farm is, like, a bird sanctuary or something.

No kidding, I would say there are around 20 bird hotels. A little alarming. Head covering is essential. And really? It is a lot alarming.

The first time I visited The Farm when I was dating The King was also a little frightening. We pulled in the driveway and there was a (gulp) deer head hanging from the basketball goal. Its business was hanging out. (You know...its business.)

I'm maybe not all the way sure that I'm ready to be a farm girl.

Oh. Here's a farm related follow-up.

Remember last year when The King lost his head and bought a motorized piece of junk?

I have now witnessed it first hand and I can officially say...

It is worse than I imagined.

This is the view facing the front. Notice how the windshield is attached by bungee cord.

The back glass is, um, a tarp.

The dash is really nice. And yes. That is a roll of toilet paper. I don't think we want to know. Let's just forget we saw that, k? I shudder to think. Really. I shudder.

There is a really awesome rearview mirror hang-y thing.

Enlarge that bad boy. It has teeth. Scary.

I think I'm gonna keep working on my farm skills.

S-l-o-o-o-o-w-l-y.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Banana. Banana Who?

I mentioned last week that I tried to get a picture of a car that was painted like a cow.

With pink udders hanging from the back bumper.

Unfortunately, I did not know how to work my phone camera.

So I practiced.

Because you just never know when the cow car might appear again. And I want to be ready.

In the meantime, guess what I saw on Friday?

Look closely. Click on the picture. Do you see what is in the back of that truck?

Am I living in Crazy World? Cow cars? Bananas in trucks?

Just for fun, leave a comment about where you think the banana was headed.

Weekend Wonderfulness

I'm not hungry right now, so I'm having trouble getting my recipe sharing groove on.

By the way, this is only, like, the third time in my whole life that I haven't been hungry.

I may be coming down with something.

Completely unrelated to food...did y'all see this story? I know it is wrong, but really. That's funny stuff. In a horrible, horrible way.

Back to the food. Which I still am not craving. Very abnormal. I wonder if something is wrong with me.

I'm thinking that you might have noticed I love food and like to cook. You've probably also noticed that if a recipe has more than 3 steps, I am so not doing it.

I am amazed at how yummy food can be with very few ingredients and minimal effort.

Now I know that a lot of you like the process of cooking fancy schmancy, and I really would like to come eat at your house, but I am not that kind of cook. (I typed the word "cooker" at first.)

I will not ever post a recipe that I haven't cooked or at least eaten. I want my bloggy friends to know that if I share a recipe, it is pretty delicious. There is nothing that frustrates me more than going to the store for ingredients, putting forth effort to make the dish, and then it bombs.

All that said, I am going to share two recipes for ham.

Get over the disappointment. I'm not hungry! And that affects my recipe choosing skills.

I am not a huge fan of meat. (Much to The King's dismay.) I do enjoy the occasional ham. Especially at Easter. Which happens to be coming soon.

Red Plum Ham

Ham (I usually buy the fully cooked ham for this recipe.)
1 jar Red Plum Jam
1 cup brown sugar

Mix the brown sugar and jam in a microwave safe bowl. Warm in the microwave for 1 minute. Stir. Keep doing that until it is smooth and saucy.

Place the ham in a big oven proof pan. I usually get a small enough ham that I can fit it in a 9x13. Pour the sauce over the ham. Cover in foil. Bake at 350 for an hour. Depending on the size of your ham, you may have to adjust the cooking time. The instructions on the ham should tell you what temperature and how long it needs to be cooked.

This is very tasty. A typical Easter dinner at our home would be this ham, potato casserole, green beans, rolls, salad and dessert. Oh and deviled eggs. Deviled eggs are a must.

The next ham recipe is SO good. It is excellent paired with the Pot 'O Beans from a few weeks ago. I can eat those 2 for days. It makes great sandwiches, too.

Overnight Ham

5 pound ham with bone in (I love the spiral sliced ham.)
2 huge handfuls of brown sugar (like man handfuls)
1 small can of sliced pineapple

Place the ham in a big roaster type of pan. I usually buy a disposable one at the store because I don't have a big roaster pan. Rub the brown sugar all over the ham--getting down in the slices if it is a sliced ham. Pour the pineapples and juice over the ham. Cover with foil tightly.

Bake at 275 for 8 to 9 hours.

This is so good. It falls off of the bone.

I know that there is nothing especially exciting about ham. But if ham could cause excitement, it would have something to do with these recipes.

Feel free to make requests. I live to serve.

I hope you enjoy one or both of these.

Have a wonderful weekend!!

Take A Haec

What? Is something wrong?

Oh...you are wondering about that word in my title?

I'll be more than happy to explain.

But first. Let me just go off the "glass half full" record for a few minutes. I've been half full all stinkin' night and now I'd like to vent to a few of my friends. And be half empty.

I'm not sure what is up, but I'm about lessoned out.

So tonight was the Latin Spelling Bee at The Princess' school. You might remember that the Bee discovery was part of my really great day yesterday. The part where I found out about it, oh, let's see...yesterday.

The school requires that the students take Latin. I wasn't sure if Latin was a real language or not. I'm kind of still not sure. I guess it is spoken somewhere. Is it spoken somewhere?

(All of you smart language arts people, chill. I'm doing really well in math and other useful stuff. I can't be all things to all subjects.)

Anyway, they have a Latin Spelling Bee for the 3rd & 4th graders and then one for the 5th through 8th graders. The winners of each bee then compete against each other for Champion of the Entire Latin World. So here comes my first gripe:

Is it really likely that a 3rd grade student is gonna take down an 8th grade student?

Thank you. I feel better. I just needed to say that.

So last year's Latin teacher was a sweet lady who focused on learning the meaning of the words. This year's teacher is really great. He loves Latin. He really wants the kids to learn it and love it. I'm incredibly impressed with him. He even has classes for the moms. I went to one. I kind of got it. But then I lost it.

Round 1 of the Latin Bee begins. There were 20 kids in the 3rd & 4th grade bee. The words were all over the place.

I mean, to someone who hasn't the foggiest idea about the language, those words were all over the place.

Example: One girl's Round 1 word was et (pronounced et). Another girl's Round 1 word was vestigium (pronounced west eeg iuum).

Don't be making fun of my pronunciations.

So The Princess gets up to the microphone. Her word?

"Hike."

She asks Mr. Latin if he could repeat the word.

"Hike."

She paused. "Hike. H......I.......K......E Hike."

"I'm sorry. That is incorrect. The correct spelling is H-A-E-C."

Her half-full mother is shooting the thumbs up signal with a grin that would've rivaled The Joker. I'm mouthing words of encouragement out the wazoo: Great Job!; I'm So Proud of You!; You Looked So Pretty Up On Stage (that one always worked for me); You Had Such A Great Smile!!

At the end of Round 1 there were 4 kids left. I'd say this Latin thing is taking off.

One of The Princess' best friends made it to the final two. We were so proud of her. Her word was Magister (pronounced mag eeest ur). She spelled "M-a-g-i-s-e, I mean, t-e-r". I'm sorry, her word was incorrect. The correct spelling was M-a-g-i-s-t-e-r. She handled it very well. The Princess probably would've demanded a recount. Or a retrial. Or an appeal. Or she'd have cried.

I so don't expect The Princess to win all things. I don't care that she went out in the first round. I wouldn't care if she was the only one that went out in the first round.

I mentioned yesterday that The Princess' glass has been half empty lately. There's a lot of life lessons to wade through when you're 10.

I think the most difficult lesson she's learning right now is that life is not always fair. Sometimes the good guys don't win. Sometimes your best isn't enough. Sometimes your competitor gets a break that you don't get.

And I'm having to spread rainbows and sunshine all over the place to show her to rejoice in all things.

What I really want to do is tell her that it wasn't fair. The girl that won had words so easy even I, her language-impaired mama, could spell them. I want to tell her that this Latin junk is for the birds and let's just get through it without putting forth the hour a day that it takes. I want to tell her that it is stupid and the bee is stupid.

I really, really want to write, "I don't laec Latin" 50 times and give it to the teacher.

But I have to be the mom.

I have to be the sensible one that teaches her how to win with grace and lose with grace.

I have to teach her that awards and accolades don't show what is in her heart. Win or lose.

I have to tell her that her true character will not be measured when she's winning and at the top of her game.

I know that someday she'll experience the joy of winning. Someday she'll be the one that gets the advantage.

Just not today.

Another lesson? Cheeseburgers and milkshakes make everything a little bit better. Win or Lose.

(Speaking of yummy things to cheer you up...head over to Take 90 West for a fun surprise!!)

Guess What I Got To Do?

Don't you just love it when you have to get to set an example for your kids?

My Bible Study on Tuesday was great as usual. We are reading The Power of a Positive Woman by Karol Ladd. Our chapter was about hope. Our sweet leader talked a lot about our attitude.

Mine's great, don't ya think?

Our leader mentioned that when her daughters were young, she would have to remind them to change their words. When they would say, "I have to do my homework." She would tell them, "No. You get to do your homework."

I thought that sounded like a super idea. My Princess struggles a bit with her glass being half empty. It drives me nuts. I know right where she gets it, though.

The King.

Oh, I kid. It comes straight from her mama. My tendency is to immediately focus on why I can't do something...why it won't work...why it might wear me out, etc.

You know, there's nothing like seeing your bad habits in mini version to help you to see how ugly they are. (The habits, not the kids.)

I have to work really hard every single day at keeping my glass half full.

But I've learned that, for me, it is a choice. I can choose how I look at the events of my day.

A few years ago I decided that I would look at my mundane chores a little differently. Rather than whine about every load of laundry that I fold, I would be grateful. Not that I had clothes (though I am) or that I had a washer & dryer (glad for those, too), but that I had a husband and daughter whose clothes I could clean. I wouldn't fuss about unloading the dishwasher...I would be thankful for the little hands that ate off of that plate.

It sounds a little dorky, but it works.

In the blink of an eye I could be without either of my peeps. I'd say I can suffer through cleaning the bathtub for them.

So after thinking about all of that, I decided that The Princess could use a dose of happy.

Yesterday morning I decided that I was going to be very careful and deliberate with the words that I used throughout the day. I was going to try to look at each situation through my rose colored glasses. (They were HARD to find. I had apparently put them away quite some time ago.) I wanted The Princess to see how to turn her lemons to lemonade.

(If you can think of any more positive thinking cliches let me know, I'm about out...)

So, here's a snapshot of our Wednesday:

We woke up late. I had to get the dogs to the groomer and The Princess started on her school work. This one wasn't too hard. "Aren't you glad we got a little bit of extra rest?"

I was out of my favorite breakfast: The Luscious and Fabulous Chocoate Caramel Cluster Zone Bar. Ok. I can do this..."This is fun! I can try something new for breakfast!!"

We received an email reminder of the school's mandatory Latin spelling bee tonight. Of which we had no idea. And it is tonight. "Won't that be exciting! You don't even have time to be nervous!!"

This is where it really became fun.

Oliver, my cat, had the runs in the night. And apparently sat in them. His beautiful, white, fluffy, coat, um, wasn't. So I tried to laugh about it. "Hahaha. Isn't it funny that, um, Oliver, um has, um..." Struggling.

And then I saw that I wasn't going to be able to cut the nasty out. I was going to have to wash it out. (gulp) The problem with this (besides the embedded cat poop) is that Oliver bites hard when you try to wash him. Like, draws serious blood. So. I couldn't let The Princess help.

Not that she was offering.

I had to hold him by his scruff to keep him from mutilating me. (Let's not forget that cat poop smells worse than any other documented smell in the known world.) I had to run the water, rub the shampoo and (gag reflex kicking in) scrape. out. the. poop. with. my. fingers. of. the. other. hand.

In my rose colored glasses.

"Isn't it so great for Daddy that he's out of town? Isn't that so funny that this happened while he's on vacation working?"

(Ok. If you want some serious joy, click on that picture.)

Throw in trash night and the cat (who is apparently ill) throwing up in my bedroom and you can imagine the joy spewing from my lips.

Oh, and thank you very much, Kelly... the Chick-Fil-A nuggets that I had been craving ALL STINKIN' DAY were ice cold.

But at least I'm the one that gets to teach The Princess all about this nutty life.

If she can learn how to find joy in each day (you don't know how bad I wanted to say, "...if she can learn to turn her frown upside down..") her life will be so much more fulfilling.

That's a reminder that I needed, too.

(Perhaps without the object lesson involving the cat.)